Something I don't want to deal with!

Debbie just called me and told me my Mom is scheduled to have a heart valve replacement next Tuesday. With all that is going on, it's something that I just don't want to have to think about. I want forget it in the bustle of my life, and pretend it isn't happening. I know that I should go see my parents before the surgery, but I sure would like to avoid it. It's not that I don't love my parents. I don't want to see them getting old and having these problems.

Amber on the slide

Amber on the slide
Originally uploaded by carignan.

Getting so big so quick.

Hippie Izzy

Hippie Izzy
Originally uploaded by carignan.

Straight out of the Arcata bottoms with Dill Loc.

Change for the better

"Man is capable of changing the world for the better if possible, and of changing himself for the better if necessary." Viktor Frankl

How different my life is today.

As a child I always dreamed about being a larger than life hero. My favorite author, Robert E. Howard wrote the Conan series of books about a barbarian warrior that became King. Conan's heroic stories allowed me to escape from my life. Today my life is not what I dreamed it would be.
Going to work, school and home is not the adventure of my youth. It is the adventure of a different sort, fulfilling and challenging, yet mundane. I am realizing that I am stuck in a routine that ensures failure not success. I need to change. Today I am going to try and start anew with the important people in my life, make some apologizes and make concrete efforts to be a better Husband, Father, along with all the other roles I have. I am sorry to all the people I have dissappointed, namely my wife and children. It seems like they have suffered the most from my lack of effort. I need to review what I do on a daily basis and see if it really matters when I look at the direction I want my life to take. If it really even matters at all.