Amber

Amber
Originally uploaded by carignan.

My beautiful baby, Amber.

Sync'Em | Sync'Em

Sync'Em | Sync'Em

Some interesting software that I am going to try.

Assumptions

Our minds have the need to “know.” When we don’t know, we make assumptions - they make us feel safer than not knowing. And we are pretty much always making assumptions. We assume that we know how someone is going to react to us. We assume that our efforts will or will not be successful. And not only do we believe our assumptions about what other people are thinking, but then we end up taking those assumptions personally and even end up resenting the person. To avoid assumptions, ask questions. It takes courage to trust the present moment, to allow other people to be exactly who they are, and to let life unfold according to its own plan… and it avoids a great deal of suffering.
-Don Miguel Ruiz, The Four Agreements [agreement 3: Don’t make assumptions]

Thoughts

Amber and I
Originally uploaded by carignan.

There are days when I feel so upset about what is going on in my life. It just doesn't seem like I really have anyway to fix it. Maybe the problems don't need to be fixed, but just accepted. I do have alot to be thankful for in my life, and it's not that. Maybe it's that I just have to much. I'd like to let go of some things, but it just might not ever get done, and that's something I just can't accept. I wish I had some support.

Something I should remember.

“Remember not only to say the right thing in the right place, but far more difficult still, to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment."

Benjamin Franklin

My ADHD life

My ADHD life
Originally uploaded by carignan.

Just a bit of boredom. Found on the web at Project Sidewalk.

Being myself

"If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away." — Henry David Thoreau

Mens Restroom Palm Middle School MVUSD

Mens Restroom Palm Middle School MVUSD
Originally uploaded by carignan.

Notice the small bee decal in the urinal.

Another afternoon of meetings

Another afternoon of meetings
Originally uploaded by carignan.

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

Remember The Milk - Craig's Tasks

Remember The Milk - Craig's Tasks

I'm starting to use RTM for a task list. I set Debbie up with an account time will tell if I get organized enough to GTD.

Classes have started

Last night was the first night for the new term at the University of Redlands, Graduate School of Education. I am starting the second term of classes for my Masters in Counseling, PPS and Administrative credentials. It doesn't look so bad so far, but I already miss being with the girls at night. I wish I would have had the foresight to have finished this up earlier like Debbie kept telling me to do, but that's water beneath the bridge. Classes here at work are fine, and I believe that I am off to a good year. I have some very nice students. I can't say that I am very motivated to stay teaching in the classroom much longer though. It's lost it's magic for me. The kids are all that I enjoy about work anymore. I'd even have to say that my daughters, Izzy and Amber are all I enjoy at home. Well except some time alone with my dogs, Coco and Candy. Hopefully I can get a handle on some things that are bothering me, and get back to being alittle more happy, or at least excited about life. My parents aren't doing so well health wise, and I think it really weighs heavily on my mind most of the time. It just doesn't look good for the future for either one of them, and I don't know what I'll do without their constant support in my life. It's something that I always knew I could rely on whens things went bad, or I needed some advice. I've lost my temper a few times in the last couple weeks and haven't been really myself. The results of those outbursts are going to cost me alot, and I regret have allowed myself to get that angry, but again it's water beneath the bridge. I have to work at not allowing myself to get angry again. I do feel quite alone most of the time lately. With the girls I just can't get out much and I seem to be isolating myself in the house. I've also been loosing alot of weight these last few weeks, almost 15 pounds which is alot for me. I just don't feel like eating. I usually throw away most of my lunch, and have not been eating anything for breakfast. I guess I really need to start forcing myself to eat all my meals. I'm sure all of this will pass and I'll be okay. I've come out of things like this before.

Myself and Rory

Myself and Rory
Originally uploaded by carignan.

In class tonight at the University of Redlands for Graduate School.

Numbness

I feel like I just don't have any life today. Just a general numbness about my feelings. No joy or sadness. Not much of any feelings at all.